The Host: Movie Review with SPOILERS

The Host is based off of the novel of the same name written by Stephenie Meyer. Yes, the same author who wrote The Twilight Saga. An alien species known as souls have taken over humans by inhabiting their bodies to create peace among Earth. When Melanie Stryder (Saorise Ronan) is surrounded by a group of seekers in an old hotel she thought was abandoned, rather then getting caught she decides to jump out of the buildings window attempting to kill herself. As if some kind of miracle she survived, much to her dislike. A soul that goes by the name of Wanderer or Wanda is implanted into Melanie’s body but unlike many of the other occupied humans, some people refuse to be beat as they internally battle their host. Wanda’s job is to look into Melanie’s memories to find out where the resistance is, where the other surviving humans are. However, Melanie fights back by throwing memory after memory full of strong physical and emotional connections to the people she loves at Wanda hoping that she’ll understand how important it is for her to not say anything. As the soul begins to feel pity for Melanie and the humans they both set out on a journey to get back to Jared (Max Irons), the man she loves and her little brother Jamie (Chandler Canterbury). Nothing is means more to Melanie then her family.

When I first heard Melanie’s voice after Wanda had taken over her body I found it really annoying. I don’t know if I just got so used to it by the end of the film that it no longer bugged me or it just wasn’t as obnoxious as when it first started so that it no longer bugged me. As someone who actually read the novel I know there is no other way they could’ve accomplished this successfully. And I did warm up to it. Some of the back and forth comments between Wanda and Melanie may have come out funnier then planned but they were well received getting laughs from the audience.

This storyline line doesn’t include a love triangle, but a love square. Well it’s just really awkward. Jared and Melanie are in love with each other so that’s simple but because Melanie is trapped inside her own body she can’t be with him. Then there’s Ian (Jake Abel) who falls in love with Wanda which is the soul in Melanie’s body. So technically you have two boys in love with the same person and it’s questionable on how this could end well for everyone involved. Now, me explaining the rest of the story would be summarizing the book and I don’t care to do so. You should just pick up a copy.

One thing that bothered me was how the souls looked. I can’t really explain it but it just made me want to laugh. Specifically when Ian is looking at one at some point in the movie and just looks so in love with this little white sort of light that moves. It made me uncomfortable. Also, many of the other characters acted unnatural and zombie-like when they shouldn’t have since they were human. I understand from reading the book that they were scared of Wanda because they didn’t trust her intentions but that’s not how it came across from watching it. On top of that some of the dialogue seemed awkward and forced but those are my only complaints.

I wouldn’t call this my favourite movie but it stuck fairly close to the book. Obviously cutting out the mediocre things to leave place for those scenes of importance. But i’m also judging this as a fan who loved the books so you need to keep that in mind. I’m not sure you’d like the movie at all if you were a middle-aged man who just loves to complain about everything. This sci-fi teen romance wasn’t aimed towards their demographic so I don’t blame them, but it was aimed at mine so maybe i’m really the more trustworthy one. Anyone who loved the book will love this movie regardless of what critics have to say.

The Host hit theatres today, Friday March 29th 2012

Trailer:

Springbreakers: Movie Review with SPOILERS

I’d say Springbreakers was a hot mess from beginning to end but really it was just a mess. 13 people walked out of the advance screening I was at tonight in Toronto. And then others took some really long… bathroom breaks? The movie’s just one long music video for Skrillex. I do think it says something when this movie’s been promoted via film festivals since early 2012.

Let me start off by saying that Selena Gomez plays herself in this movie. Her character Faith, is a church girl who prays and is an overall goody two shoes. There is no nudity on her part and a small dosage of smoking, drinking and getting high. After getting arrested with her friends she simply cries and complains that this isn’t what their trip was supposed to be like and she wants to go home, so she does. End Selena Gomez’s part in the movie. Now, I’d like to mention that Faith does not partake in the crime committed in order to fund their spring break trip. While Candy, Brit and Cotty are robbing a restaurant with fake guns threatening to kill everyone inside Faith is nowhere to be found. Nor does she snort the cocaine they end up being arrested for. I’m actually so confused on why she was even a part of the film.

Rachel Korine plays Cotty who doesn’t have a backstory or character development like everyone else in the movie. Rachel just so happens to be married to Harmony Korine, the writer and director of Springbreakers. That has to be the only reason why she’s in this movie. That, and the fact that she was willing to show some skin. Like Selena Gomez’s character, Cotty doesn’t make it to the end of the film. After getting shot in the left arm she decides it’s time to go back to school and for some stupid reason the other two girls decide to remain.

Remember back when Vanessa Hudgens’ naked photos leaked online? Maybe they should’ve used those pictures to promote this movie. I mean, the entire world’s already seen her naked. I was kind of shocked that her boobs wasn’t one of the many pairs seen. This movie is definitely no highschool musical and Candy is not afraid to live her life. Snorting coke, drinking and threesomes Vanessa’s definitely taking a risk to no longer be known for her Disney Channel days. Except for her ugly brown roots I actually thought she did a really good job in this film. Although she hasn’t been in much else, I found that her acting felt real in this, believable.

Ashley Benson didn’t seem to talk much in the movie. Or I just can’t remember anymore. Like Candy, Brit made it to the end of the movie. Together they shot about 20 men without taking one bullet. I’m confused on how that would’ve been possible and why they wore neon yellow bathing suits to complete the task. Ashley’s character seemed to do everything that Vanessa’s did so I don’t feel the need to repeat myself.

James Franco. What is there to say about James Franco? He looks absolutely terrifying in this entire movie. His character Alien bails for the 4 girls out of jail when they’re arrested. And like Selena I would’ve fled the scene in a second because he is so goddamn creepy. At one point he starts singing Everytime by Britney Spears and it’s so awkward. When that happens, Faith is already gone but the three girls who remain have matching pink ski masks with a unicorn on the forehead, coloured bathing suits and DTF sweatpants. They show clips of them dancing, and resting their heads on one and another and it’s so unnecessary. There’s also a scene where Candy and Brit put their guns in Alien’s mouth and he starts sucking on them like dicks. He gets really into it. I just don’t even understand why that was in the film. It’s seriously so uncomfortable to watch as an audience member. On top of that, there’s some other scenes at the piano where Alien speaks lines of a poem about 4 chicks aka the 4 girls. Last but not least when he brings the girls to his home he just keeps saying “look at my shit” over and over. It’s almost as bad as hearing “spring break forever” a million times.

I’m actually curious on if the cast of Springbreakers is actually proud of this movie cause I thought the best part was when it ended. The entire time I felt secondhand embarrassment for the actors involved. Awkward situation after awkward situation can do that to a person. I understand this film is a satire but it’s just a piece of crap. I do not recommend this to anyone. Maybe someone I hate but not even then. No one should have to endure the pain caused by this movie.

If you don’t listen to my warning and go see it anyway, be prepared for a lot of boobs. And when I say a lot I mean A LOT.

To see pictures from when I attended the Springbreakers premiere at TIFF back in September 2012 you can here.

Springbreakers hits theatres this Friday, March 29th in Canada

Trailer:

Admission: Movie Review with SPOILERS

I went into Admission tonight without knowing a thing about the movie except for the fact that Paul Rudd and Tina Fey starred in it. I absolutely loved it and maybe that’s because I never saw a trailer beforehand. If that’s the case, i’m never watching a movie trailer ever again because it ruins the magic of seeing a film for the very first time.

Tina Fey plays Portia, a Princeton University admissions officer who’s asked by an old college acquaintance John (Paul Rudd) to visit his alternative high school. John wants Portia to meet Jeremiah (Nat Wolff) whom he believes is the son she gave up for adoption back in college. With this knowledge Portia goes out of her way, making a huge professional risk to try and help Jeremiah get into Princeton.

I hardly recognized Michael Sheen without the long hair and creepy accent he has when he plays Aro in the Twilight Saga. Actually, that’s the only way i’ve ever seen him except for in this movie. However best supporting actor in this film has to go to Lilly Tomlin who plays Susannah, Portia’s feminist mother. When you meet her it’s no surprise that Portia became the boring, uptight, closed-off person that she is when compared to her psychopathic mom. The kid who plays John’s adoptive son Nelson (Travaris Spears) is both adorable and funny. His sarcastic attitude throughout the movie makes him loveable and understanding because he’s tired of moving from place to place like John always does to help others.

The movie starts with Portia finding out that her boss (Wallace Shawn) is going to retirement meaning that she has the possibility of getting his job. But she has some competition, there’s also Corinne (Gloria Reuben) who wants the job just as much as Portia does. Then you get to meet Mark (Michael Sheen) the man with whom Portia lives with but they’re not married and have no children. Portia spends her next driving from school to school telling teenagers the secret to getting into Princeton. Shocker, there is none. She ends up going to John’s school where the students question why they should apply there when they just want to help change the world. Of course for a lot of things like becoming a lawyer, or doctor you’d need a degree. Before she can leave John introduces her to Jeremiah and thinks that they should get to know each other which she doesn’t care to do.

Portia goes home to find out that Mark’s leaving her for a Virginia Woolf scholar who is currently pregnant with his twins. The film is full of quirky moments where Portia will run into Mark and his new girlfriend is shooting daggers at him and they run off. Portia begins to get to know John more and at the same time starts to believe that Jeremiah is her son. There’s a lot of stuff that happens in between (for movie purpose) but even though he has no chance of getting in Portia goes out of her way to get him accepted. She completes her goal by the end of the movie but ends up being fired for her actions. When she goes to tell Jeremiah that she’s really his birth mother she finds out that the name on the birth certificate was for 11pm and not 1pm meaning that it’s not her child.

After it all Portia realizes that she really wants to know the child that she gave up for adoption all those years ago but she gets a letter saying that he’s not ready to meet her at the current time. As for your happily ever after, Portia and John end up together of course.

I didn’t want to ruin absolutely everything for you just the main things you may have been wondering. I ain’t gonna write a transcript haha – but I do really think that this movie was great and I hope to see more comedies like this from Tina Fey in particular (since 30 Rock’s now done).

Sidenote: I decided to watch the trailer for Admission and unlike Identity Thief where they showed everything funny in the promo this movie did not.

Admission hits theatres today, Friday March 22, 2013

Trailer:

Identity Thief: Movie Review with SPOILERS

Melissa McCarthy’s become all the rage lately, hasn’t see? Because of her character Megan in Bridesmaids and her television show Mike and Molly? The sudden love drives me crazy when there’s suddenly all these people who come along pretending to be huge fans since forever when they probably don’t even know that she used to play Sookie St. James on Gilmore Girls. Along with Lauren Graham and Alexis Bledel she was my childhood. Beside’s the fact that Melissa and I have the same name, clearly, so it was a match made in heaven.

Sandy Patterson (Jason Bateman), a business man travels from his home in Denver to Florida to chase down the women, Diana (Melissa McCarthy) who’s stolen his identity, because he has a girls name.

Long story short this is what happens: Sandy goes to Florida to find the women pretending to be her. They meet on the highway where she ends up stealing his car and has the keys from hers but inside the car is her address so he shows up at her house. But you can’t let the movie end that fast because then you don’t have a movie so these two random people known as Julian and Marisol show up at the front door looking for Diana themselves. On top of the bounty hunter Skiptracer who’s also looking for her. Sandy and Diana end up getting to Denver and he learns that she’s really not a bad person and decides that he doesn’t want to turn her in so she ends up doing it herself. Then Sandy and his family end up being only friends Diana has and then the movie’s over. Everything inbetween that is very unnecessary but added to make the length 112 minutes. If you have any questions about specific scenes you’ve seen in the trailer or want a more detailed spoiler post I can do so but the movie is the trailer. You’ve already seen it.

I guess I have to agree with a fair amount of people on Rotten Tomatoes who have reviewed this film before me. Throughout the entire movie the comedic moments are there, just not as funny as one would think from the beginning. There are also times were jokes or scenes were taken too far, clearly the reason behind it’s R rating. Aside from the fact that most of the few hilarious moments were shown in the trailer. There are unnecessary characters thrown in that are unnecessary, like Julian, Marisol and Skiptracer who are chasing Diana themselves aside from Sandy as the movie continues to drag on. I believe that more people will be rather disappointed with the outcome then they would’ve thought going in. I only assume people look forward to it because of McCarthy’s plus-size  figure which absolutely disgusts me. Lesson learned: Good actors don’t always make good movies.

Identity Thief hits theatres Friday, February 8th 2013.

Trailer:

Warm Bodies: Movie Review with SPOILERS

Warm Bodies

Warm Bodies is based off of  Isaac Marion’s popular novel of the same name. The author originally wrote a short story called, I Am a Zombie Filled with Love which became an internet sensation nearly three years ago before Atria Books acquired the publishing rights for the full novel back in 2010. The full length story known as Warm Bodies was published in 2011.

The book jacket says, “’R’ is a zombie. He has no name, no memories, and no pulse, but he has dreams. He is a little different from his fellow Dead.” In a post apocalyptic America destroyed by war, disease and the loss of humans hunger from the growing number of the undead R (Nicholas Hoult) falls for a girl named Julie (Teresa Palmer). For an unknown reason he chooses to spare her life rather then making her a meal. He craves something more then just blood. Well actually there is a reason, to ensure that a killed human doesn’t come back to life as a corpse you have to eat their brain. By doing so it allows you to see their memories and have their feelings. Causing R to make an unexpected choice to save the victim’s girlfriend which breaks all the rules. Their strange relationship begins to change R. He’s becoming more human every day that passes and it’s beginning to catch on to the other corpses as well as they remember how to feel. R wants to live. And Julie wants to help him but it isn’t going to be easy to convince the humans. In the rotting world they’re stuck living; Julie, R and the other zombies won’t go down without a fight. This comedic love story is tale about the power of human connection and one you don’t want to miss.

Like the various trailers for this film the movie opens with a witty and clever introduction to the zombie apocalypse and R’s world. The hilarious commentary pulls the audience in from the very beginning and keeps your eyes attached to the screen until the very end. The humans spend their time killing zombies and trying to save their family members from becoming one of them. The cure is to live. That was unknown to everyone until Julie and R helped them realize. As the minutes on the clock rolled by they were running out of time to convince the humans as the bonies (zombies that have worn away to become only skeletons) were also getting closer to killing them themselves. The bonies were not happy about R saving Julie and wanted them both dead as well as the rest of the zombies who weren’t on their side. R makes the final choice to save Julie when they fall many feet into a pool of water. Miraculously they both live. After Julie kisses R you see his pupils get bigger and his eyes become blue, the final transformation. When they pull away Julie’s father shoots R only for Julie to notice that he’s bleeding and corpses do not bleed. He actually became human from living.

Fun fact: The film and book make various references to the famous tragic love story Romeo and Juliet. The most obvious being the main characters names; ‘R’ and ‘Julie’ for ‘Romeo’ and ‘Juliet.’ There’s also a scene in the movie where Julie’s outside on her friend Nora’s balcony and R is standing at the bottom. He can’t get caught by any humans because they’d shoot him dead within seconds. RomeoRomeowherefore art thou Romeo?

Nicholas Hoult is an amazing actor. Watching him on screen, you can’t help but fall for his character. It’s the same way I  felt when I first saw him in X Men: First Class. I don’t know if there’s anyone who could’ve played this part better then him, specifically when it came to those subtle expressions. Spot on. I really enjoyed Rob Corddry who played M, another Zombie and R’s best friend. He was the lucky actor who got to swear the most and make some really great comments. Teresa Palmer was someone i’ve never heard of before this film. I thought she did a really great job even if I think it should’ve been me making out with Nick instead. Yeah, i’m just a little bitter…

Make sure to check out Warm Bodies next week when it hits theatres on Friday February 1, 2013.

Trailer:

The Paperboy: Movie Review with SPOILERS

Within the first 10 minutes you get to see Zac Efron in his underwear and that’s what I call a good movie. However, if I were a guy i’d probably say that the best part was Nicole Kidman.

The Paperboy is a film based off the novel of the same name written by Peter Dexter. A writer, Ward Jansen (Matthew McConaughey) and his partner Yardley Acheman (David Oyelowo) return to his Florida hometown to investigate a murder. With the help of his brother Jack Jansen (Zac Efron) and Charlotte Bless (Nicole Kidman) they try to prove that Hillary Van Wetter (John Cusack) was framed for the murder of a local sheriff. The movie is voiced over by Anita Chester (Macy Gray) but and her character also plays a roll in the movie itself.

If anyone’s gonna pee on him, it’s gonna be me,” Charlotte states before doing so on Jack’s face, chest and groin area after he gets stung by jellyfish on the beach. A sort of revolting close up occurs as this happens. But that’s not the first time you get a good look at Nicole Kidman’s crotch region. While possibly embarrassing herself by shaking her cleavage, sexing up every scene and talking dirty she definitely played the role. Her fake blonde hair and long eyelashes are also hard to miss.

Matthew McConaughey isn’t the sexiest face on the block, what with Nicole Kidman and Zac Efron also in the film. The addition of scars to his face didn’t help either. But to be honest even with the help of being buffed up Zac’s character doesn’t do all that much in the movie.

This thriller is filled with race, sex and murder all while the movie sends you on an uncomfortable ride with its trashy appeal and shaky cam.

And because this is a book I don’t really feel like this is spoiling all that much but I can say that i’m actually having trouble with this post. I don’t have much else to post about…

The Paperboy officially hits theatres tomorrow October 19th 2012.

Watch the trailer here:

Sinister: Movie Review with SPOILERS

This is your spoiler warning, I don’t have a filter so I will seriously ruin everything for you. If you’ve already chosen to read past the title of this post and this warning message it’s not my fault.

Continue reading

The Words: Movie Review

WOW! I’m at a slight loss of words to describe my thoughts after leaving the Advance Screening for The Words. But first I would like to thank Alliance Films for the tickets. I may have been more excited to find out that Dennis Quaid was in the movie then Bradley Cooper. C’mon, he’s always been a DILF! Remember him in The Parent Trap? Or more recently Soul Surfer? As Brooke Davis would say he’s your typical “hot dad fantasy.” Don’t get me wrong sitting in the theatre staring into Bradley Cooper’s dreamy blue eyes is pretty hypnotizing but I also kept my eyes on Dennis. 

The Words is about “A writer at the peak of his literary success discovers the steep price he must pay for stealing another man’s work.” Now I don’t want to spoil anything about the movie so i’ll be very careful in this review. I really enjoyed all the parts with Bradley Cooper (Rory Jansen) and Zoe Saldana (Dora Jansen) as well as Ben Barnes (Young Man) and Nora Arnezeder (Celia). The acting was phenomenal. This is one of the rare occasions where I was able to believe that every actor was actually their character. That doesn’t happen quite offend. I was a little confused with hot Olivia Wilde (Daniella)’s character fit into the movie and how everything with Dennis Quaid (Clay Hammond) fully related back to Bradley and Zoe. I get the main part of it but it was more that I didn’t understand the end.

Overall I really enjoyed the movie. I’d give it a 3.5/5 and recommend that you all go see it.

The Words hits theatres Friday September 7th, 2012.

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